I’ve been engaged in a few conversations with friends, students, and acquaintances this last week which has ultimately lead to them accusing me of victim blaming. Victim blaming as defined by the Canadian Resource Centre for Victims of Crime states, “Victim blaming is a devaluing act that occurs when the victim(s) of a crime or an accident is held responsible — in whole or in part — for the crimes that have been committed against them.” Reading this definition, I strongly disagree with the accusation that I victim blame, because at least from my perspective, this would suggest that Irecognize that there
was a victim and that this victim was at fault for the crime or wrong doing committed against him or her. Those are two concepts I just do not acknowledge: I do not believe that anyone is ever a victim nor do I believe in fault or blame.
Let me begin by explaining that I do not view the world in strict polarities. While I recognize the polarities that are present and available to us here on Earth, I do not perceive anything in this physical realm as being strictly one or the other. Yes, there is day and night, female and male, the heavens and the earth, however we as physical manifestations of deity move throughout the spectrum of these and the other polarities that exist, with ease and fluidly, as is our nature as human beings. Nature itself is not black or white, but rather shades of gray and depending on the situation or circumstance can be black in one moment and white the very next. Nature does not work within the realm of morals or ethics because these concepts are constructs of humans in order to live and be in unions with other humans. Nature has no such concerns.
I understand that there are laws and codes of conduct within society and because I live within society I follow them, but that does not mean that I personally believe in the laws and codes. Morals and ethics are the concepts that determine what is “good” and what is “bad” in any given situation or circumstance and while I do have personal morals, (I think everyone does), and I recognize that society has a general code of ethics, I believe that both personal and society’s are subjective in nature. While we can agree that society believes that murder is “wrong and bad” there may be a circumstance when we as a society believe it is “right and good” or at least “justifiable”. If that is the case, then how can our rules and codes of conduct be so black and white? They can’t! They are determined by the specific situation or circumstance and thus are subjective. Life, nature, isn’t so black and white. Nothing is always “right” or “wrong”, and so because of this, I don’t ascribe to the idea of blame. Blame suggests, at least to me, that someone did something “wrong”; if I don’t perceive “wrong”, I don’t perceive blame.
The experiences we have within our life occur because of the choices we make in our daily lives. Some the of quick and seemingly instantaneous decisions we make sometimes don’t seem to have a great impact on our lives; what clothes we wear for the day, where we stop to purchase our morning cup of coffee while other choices or decisions require more serious contemplation and we recognize the influence they will have on our futures; where we will live, if we want to have a children. Whether our decisions and choices are simple or complicated they all lead us to moment after moment and create a momentum propelling us forward toward what we perceive as our future. This is where The Law of Attraction concept illustrates how we can deliberately manifest a life we truly desire, by taking every choice and decision and aligning it with what our true point of focus is. Regardless of whether you ascribe to the concept of The Law of Attraction or whether you utilize it in your own life, you and I still made choices that lead us to where we are now and where we will be in an hour, a day, or a week from right now. Even when it may have appeared to you that you had “no choice” in a situation, you were only perceiving the illusion of powerlessness; you had a choice. We always have a choice. No one can make anyone do something they willfully choose not to do. Even the meekest of us, a new born baby has the ability to make choices; if that baby doesn’t want to eat, that baby will not eat.
At this point many of you will be nodding in agreement with me, until we consider the idea of illness, pain, suffering, and death.
“She didn’t choose to have cancer!”
“I didn’t choose to be abused by my Father!”
“He didn’t choose to be robbed at gun point!”
“The people in that club didn’t choose to be killed!”
Many people would view these individuals as victims. None of them choose those experiences, and while she didn’t directly choose to have cancer, she made decisions that lead to that particular outcome and on some level she (the entire mind, body, spirit that makes her who she is) desired to experience whatever the cancer brought into her life experience. And while it may be difficult for us to understand because we are not her, we did not think her thoughts or feel her emotions, there was some benefit gained from her condition to the entirety of her because we are all more than our physical bodies.
Now I am not saying that I expect every human experience to be happy and filled with joy that is not what life on Earth is about. This realm is about variety and contrast; it is about experiencing the spectrum of the polarities that are offered here. I am also not saying that when I witness illness, pain, or suffering I do not have an immediate emotional response, because I usually do, what I am saying is that no one is a victim. We are each responsible for what happens in our own life. I do recognize that when we are in relationships with other people, regardless of the type of relationship we have with them we are able to influence them. We may not be able to make someone else do what we want them to do, but we can sway their actions and thoughts, which can certainly make life complicated. Even in a situation where we can and perhaps even do influence someone, this does not remove their personal responsibility within that situation, they have allowed us to sway them, which is a choice and thusly makes them partial responsible for the interaction.
No one is at fault. No one is to blame. No one is a victim.
Each of us have personal power.
We each make our own choices.
We are our own sovereigns.
Let me begin by explaining that I do not view the world in strict polarities. While I recognize the polarities that are present and available to us here on Earth, I do not perceive anything in this physical realm as being strictly one or the other. Yes, there is day and night, female and male, the heavens and the earth, however we as physical manifestations of deity move throughout the spectrum of these and the other polarities that exist, with ease and fluidly, as is our nature as human beings. Nature itself is not black or white, but rather shades of gray and depending on the situation or circumstance can be black in one moment and white the very next. Nature does not work within the realm of morals or ethics because these concepts are constructs of humans in order to live and be in unions with other humans. Nature has no such concerns.
I understand that there are laws and codes of conduct within society and because I live within society I follow them, but that does not mean that I personally believe in the laws and codes. Morals and ethics are the concepts that determine what is “good” and what is “bad” in any given situation or circumstance and while I do have personal morals, (I think everyone does), and I recognize that society has a general code of ethics, I believe that both personal and society’s are subjective in nature. While we can agree that society believes that murder is “wrong and bad” there may be a circumstance when we as a society believe it is “right and good” or at least “justifiable”. If that is the case, then how can our rules and codes of conduct be so black and white? They can’t! They are determined by the specific situation or circumstance and thus are subjective. Life, nature, isn’t so black and white. Nothing is always “right” or “wrong”, and so because of this, I don’t ascribe to the idea of blame. Blame suggests, at least to me, that someone did something “wrong”; if I don’t perceive “wrong”, I don’t perceive blame.
The experiences we have within our life occur because of the choices we make in our daily lives. Some the of quick and seemingly instantaneous decisions we make sometimes don’t seem to have a great impact on our lives; what clothes we wear for the day, where we stop to purchase our morning cup of coffee while other choices or decisions require more serious contemplation and we recognize the influence they will have on our futures; where we will live, if we want to have a children. Whether our decisions and choices are simple or complicated they all lead us to moment after moment and create a momentum propelling us forward toward what we perceive as our future. This is where The Law of Attraction concept illustrates how we can deliberately manifest a life we truly desire, by taking every choice and decision and aligning it with what our true point of focus is. Regardless of whether you ascribe to the concept of The Law of Attraction or whether you utilize it in your own life, you and I still made choices that lead us to where we are now and where we will be in an hour, a day, or a week from right now. Even when it may have appeared to you that you had “no choice” in a situation, you were only perceiving the illusion of powerlessness; you had a choice. We always have a choice. No one can make anyone do something they willfully choose not to do. Even the meekest of us, a new born baby has the ability to make choices; if that baby doesn’t want to eat, that baby will not eat.
At this point many of you will be nodding in agreement with me, until we consider the idea of illness, pain, suffering, and death.
“She didn’t choose to have cancer!”
“I didn’t choose to be abused by my Father!”
“He didn’t choose to be robbed at gun point!”
“The people in that club didn’t choose to be killed!”
Many people would view these individuals as victims. None of them choose those experiences, and while she didn’t directly choose to have cancer, she made decisions that lead to that particular outcome and on some level she (the entire mind, body, spirit that makes her who she is) desired to experience whatever the cancer brought into her life experience. And while it may be difficult for us to understand because we are not her, we did not think her thoughts or feel her emotions, there was some benefit gained from her condition to the entirety of her because we are all more than our physical bodies.
Now I am not saying that I expect every human experience to be happy and filled with joy that is not what life on Earth is about. This realm is about variety and contrast; it is about experiencing the spectrum of the polarities that are offered here. I am also not saying that when I witness illness, pain, or suffering I do not have an immediate emotional response, because I usually do, what I am saying is that no one is a victim. We are each responsible for what happens in our own life. I do recognize that when we are in relationships with other people, regardless of the type of relationship we have with them we are able to influence them. We may not be able to make someone else do what we want them to do, but we can sway their actions and thoughts, which can certainly make life complicated. Even in a situation where we can and perhaps even do influence someone, this does not remove their personal responsibility within that situation, they have allowed us to sway them, which is a choice and thusly makes them partial responsible for the interaction.
No one is at fault. No one is to blame. No one is a victim.
Each of us have personal power.
We each make our own choices.
We are our own sovereigns.
