As we sold our belongings while still living in Massachusetts I began experiencing the shifting that had begun taking place within my practice, but if I am honest with myself and review the path my Craft has taken I would have to admit that this transformation began back in 2016 when Lunar Wisdom Coven dissolved as my husband (and magickal partner at the time) agreed that we would begin to focus on relocating to Seattle, Washington. Once that intention was set forth into the Universe the gods worked with that energy and began shifting the seemingly complicated situations in our lives so that a new path was being forged for us to follow. Relationships began to fall apart, work situations started to crumble, my eyes were opened to circumstances and people that just didn't "fit" with me and my personal goal any longer (or perhaps never did and I just "made do" because that was all that was available to me at the time). Regardless I was shifting and changing and things that no longer matched the new vibrational frequency I was aligning with were falling away preparing me for the relocation.
During this time I had close relationships with the goddess, Danu and the god, Cernunnos. My work with them was challenging but ever so fulfilling. I had begun to do research on my ancestry and heritage seeking to answer the question of where my people came from ... what continent and what spirituality did they follow? Who were my personal Ancestors? Who did they worship? What did they believe? Somehow I knew this would be important to me in he near future though I hadn't been too interested in the topic in my recent past. As I researched I felt the presence of both Danu and Cernunnos slowly begin to fade. I recognized this sensation as I had experienced it when my relationships with Isis, Thoth, and Bast came to an end, but unlike those instances there was no god I could identify calling to me instead there was this force ... this intimidating presence. I began seeking ways to identify who this might be, if it was a god at all. I wrote a blog post about this HERE though now reviewing my journey I am not entirely convinced about who aided me during this transition. The energy of this entity was strong and forceful ... powerful and daunting. It was a force that I required within me and within my life to make the break from my "old ways" and prepare me for the "new way". It utterly destroyed everything in its path leaving nothing behind for me to return to if I so desired, because in my heart I didn't desire to return, but the fear I held wanted something left behind "just in case".
I find myself in unfamiliar territory. I am without a Matron or Patron, which is a first for me (and frankly is uncomfortable) because even when I was a child I had a relationship with Jesus Christ and later with the Abrahamic God, Jehovah God, and the Blessed Mother - all personified images of these Primordial Forces that now permeate my Craft. My relationships with the Beloved Dead and my Familiar Spirit have taken less prioritized roles, while the Ancestors, Elemental Forces, and the Fae have become paramount. I no longer identify as Wiccan. My practice lies somewhere between structured rituals and free flowing chaos. Communing with the land here in Washington state is something that is vital at this time for me, my focus is here and now, the dirt and the sun. It feels as if I left the land of the dead and have crossed into the land of the living and it feels like such a contradiction since I've come West, but even this simple idea, this traditional magickal correspondence perfectly illustrates where I now find my Craft.