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Ending a Relationship With a Deity

12/12/2018

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In an email from a subscriber / viewer of my YouTube Channel I was asked, "How do you end a relationship with a god when you feel the time with them is done?" Honestly I had never really considered this topic throughout the time I've been involved with my spiritual path though I do not have a specific god or goddess that I worship or work with at this time, I have in the past. Over the years I've been following a pagan spirituality my matron and patron deities have shifted  and I've had rich and full relationships with; the Christian god, Mother Mary, Jehovah, Bast, Isis, Thoth, Danu, and Cernunnos, so I took some time and contemplated how my relationship with one god ended and another began. I wanted to give an honest answer to the inquiry I was given. 

To begin I want to express that I believe it's important to remember that each of us will have a different relationship with our gods even if we happen to work with or worship the same god or goddess. The gods will present themselves to us in a way that is unique to each of us and we will perceive them and interpret our interactions with them in a personal way from our own perspective that has been shaped by our life experiences. My relationship with Isis will be different from your relationship with Isis. My work with Cernunnos may be very different than my daughter's work with him or even our Coven's work with him. I think this is important to remember because I've seen many individuals believe that there is only one "true" way or one "right" way to work with a particular god or goddess and if you don't follow their perceived "right" or "true" way then you aren't working with that particular god or goddess. Frankly, I don't believe that to be true. Yes, I believe we should involve ourselves in researching the gods that call to us and learn about their mythology by reading books and perhaps watching videos of others who work with the god or goddess and listening to their experiences with them, but this does not mean that our interactions will be the same or remotely similar. It will give us deeper understanding of one perspective and may reveal some knowledge that could be helpful to us as we interact with and nurture a relationship with that particular god or goddess. 

Personally I treat my relationships with the gods as I do any other relationship I am a part of in my life. It's been this way for me since I was a girl. When I work with the energies of deities they are personified. Each god is given a visual image in my mind as I work with them. I have always interacted with the gods in this manner as it enables me to treat the relationship as if it were manifested in the physical realm. The Christian god appeared to me as a kindly Grandfather image and Jesus appeared to me as an older brother and in later years a peer. 
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Mother Mary was always the image of divine feminine for me even before I knew what that really meant. She was who I aspired to be in the completeness that she was; body, mind, and spirit. All the gods and goddesses I interacted with held a 
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strong appealing image for me enabling all exchanges and interactions through meditations and visions to be as real as any other exchanges I had in the physical realm with human friends, family, and acquaintances. ​I believe this is what allowed me to build strong intimate relationships with each of the deities I worked with in my spiritual life. 

When it came to the time where I felt a relationship was dwindling or that my time spent with a particular deity was complete I would respond in the same way I would when I found I was spending less and less time with a friend. Unlike friends I've had in the past, I would never feel angry or upset ... I recognized that during my life experience there would be times when a friend and I would part ways because our lives were taking us in different directions and when this would occur I would be saddened that we were parting ways, but happy that they were living life in accordance with their desires. This was the same way I felt when my time with a god or goddess was ending. I would take time to honor and celebrate what we shared, as well as honor the parting. I don't feel that the gods I've worked with are ever truly gone from my life ... more like they've stepped back and are in the peripheral of my spiritual life; observing and holding "space" for me so that I may experience life with my new gods and grow as a complete human being. It feels as if I am building my own pantheon of gods that are bound together through me even if they are of different cultures and spiritual traditions. 

Practically when my relationship ends or shifts with a particular god or goddess I hold a ritual and thank them for the time they spent with me, for the energy they expended on our relationship, and the wisdom they've bestowed upon me. I give them an offering and release them as I would if I had evoked them within a cast circle, but as I've already expressed I feel as if they are always with me. 

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